Chilli Crab is British...

So we were driving back home in the SNAZZY new Toyota Vios TRD, when the conversation picks up a controversial topic.

I think we all know about the recent malaysian food claims. Malaysia now claims that Hainanese chicken rice, chilli crab, nasi lemak, bak ku teh and laksa, among others, belong to THEM. Singapore APPARENTLY doesnt give a shit. I mean, the minister basically said, "Whatever~~... just as long as they recognize that there is a Singapore version." Which is utter BULLSHIT.

I mean Malaysian version and Singapore version?? WTF? "Excuse me, miss, can i have some Chilli Crab, Malaysian Version 1.1?" LOLZ... I bet they're thinking, "Chilli Crab Version Singapore XP Professional."

Bastards, as if we needed more things to sour the relationship.

IMO, there is no owner, bcos simply put, Singapore WAS Malaysia ANYWAY. I mean the self-professed inventor of Chilli Crab Roland Lim (from the New Paper), made a dead giveaway. He claimed that "Chilli Crab has been around for 59 years." AH HA!!! That was while Singapore was still under the BRITISH. Therefore, hence, ergo, (and other concluding statements), Chilli Crab is BRITISH.

If that fits your definition.

On the other hand, Jasper offered the SIMPLEST method of deciding.

"Singapore Chicken rice sux. Singapore Chilli Crab sux. Singapore Bak Ku Teh sux. Singapore Nasi Lemak sux. Singapore laksa sux. It's all better in Malaysia, hence it should be Malaysian."

Highly debateable, but still food for thought (pardon the wit).

How can you claim that something belongs to you if you cant even do it right??

I mean, i have tried Bak Ku Teh ALL OVER SINGAPORE. I tried in Woodlands, in Orchard, in Clementi, in Tampines... and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, THE BAK-KU-TEH IN SINGAPORE F-ING SUX!! And a few times i sneaked a peek into the kitchen and into the cauldron of soup there and GUESS WHAT? Pre-packaged soup packets that you can buy in the supermarket. I guess THAT's the Singapore version eh? EPIC FAIL TO YOU.

And i've tried Singapore chicken rice and it SUX to the epic extreme too. I mean the rice is still WHITE! WTF CHICKEN RICE IS THAT!!?!?!?!!??? But also, isnt it called HAINANESE CHICKEN RICE??? So shouldnt it have come from motherfucking HAINAN???!?!?!??? Helloooooooooooo~~~????

It's too bad that these terms werent decided during the great split of Singapore from Malaysia. Just like any good divorce, the assets have to be divided - and these were left out. TOO BAD FOR MALAYSIA.

And most importantly of all, it is FAR TOO LATE for Malaysia to do anything now. It's already internationally tot of that Chilli Crabs come from Singapore (as if they're a species of crab that lives in Sentosa). It's like Apple finally proving to the world that their Macs are head and shoulders above the Microsoft PC - TOO LATE BUDDY.

I would like to know how Malaysia intends to fight this out.

And best of all, i would like to know how Singapore intends to defend its food too.

Chilli Crab is British. You heard it here FIRST.